A Life Well Lived: Eulogy for Karlene Paxton, First Grade Teacher

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“All Things Bright and Beautiful”. We gather together on this bright sunny day to celebrate the life and love surrounding our friend, Karlene Paxton.

Karlene was certainly bright and beautiful, her golden yellow white hair, the happy, bright colors she wore and the way she sort of shuffle-hop-step-glided into a room full of young children. This wonderful lady, this human creature, made great by both her small and large work.

Karlene knew children. She knew ants were glorious creatures of intrigue, mystery and wonder. She knew an entire class could be halted in its tracks by SNOW! She knew attaching your mittens together by a piece of yarn and threading them through a coat so-you-don’t-lose-them was a good idea- even for grown-ups. She knew how to keep little children wide eyed and fascinated as she told them stories from the Bible.

For over 30 years, Mrs Paxton was a First Grade teacher. During her tenure, Karlene hand wrote- hand wrote- notes to each parent each week about their daughter. She always had a clunky piano in her room, a big, comfy couch and hats lining the walls. I think there was a hamster on the loose every year for about 10 years in Karlene Paxton’s First Grade class. It was legendary. And right before the end of each day, she’d turn off the lights, light a candle and choose just the right hat to go with just the right book. There’s nothing quite as delicious as a really. good. story.

Karlene could make anything with pipe cleaners, popsicle sticks and glue. Ronnie O’Connor, her longtime teaching partner, made sure I knew how she made her famous macaroni angels. How do you make a macaroni angel, you ask? A sturdy rigotoni body, bowtie for wings, elbow pasta for arms, one brown bead for a head and of course golden wire for the halo. Spray paint it all gold. Glitter was not optional.

Want to do a lesson on how to fix the kitchen sink? Karlene will be digging through your cabinets looking for just the right material for the students to make a simulated under the sink system. Not only will there be a cut and paste project for the budding plumbers, but she will have a song and a story ready to go. When Karlene came in to teach her lessons, you could always depend on the room being a complete tangle of yarn and glue and all of the children deliciously happy and satisfied with themselves and their deep learning. Karlene was always a creative, dynamic, fun force with a constantly fresh and evolving approach to teaching Young Children.

“All Creatures Great and Small.” Each Life contains a lesson. A tree, a bird, a bee. (Did you see the baby bunny outside the church today as we walked in?) The wonderings of children delighted her, “Are there dinosaurs in heaven?” Karlene Paxton had a keen ear for the teachings of blossoms, pea pods, cats and creatures and spent her life teaching children to “Stay Awake! (clap, clap) Keep Ready!” for those lessons to become visible amid our human blindness.

She loved animals. One Stuart colleague, Tica, described her as “a more colorful and bundled up St Francis of Assisi.” She knew all living things had a lesson to teach us: honeysuckle, hummingbirds, bees. Speaking of bees, she certainly worked like one. She died on the last day of school, seeing through her work of over 40 years until the very end.

On that Friday morning as I was driving to work, I must have seen 9 or 10 monarch butterflies- maybe it wasn’t that exact amount but it was enough for me to have wondered, “What is up with all of these monarch butterflies this morning?” They were floating in front of my car on my way to work, zipping all around the road as I drove. Later that day we were told the news of her passing. I suddenly knew “what was up” with all of those monarchs. 😀 Karlene.

“All Things Wise and Wonderful.” Karlene knew the critical importance of play, both in spirit and work and had a gift for seeing into the world of a child. She could reach in and pull out the best in them. She loved the loveable, haphazard “goofballs”, those kids just SO EXCITED by life they just couldn’t sit still, the odd ducks among us, and thus had a deep and rich understanding of not only the way of a child, but ultimately the way of each one of us.

She loved going to Englishtown as often as she could. It seemed she had a garlic man, a seafood man and a sock man. Based on her array of colorful jewelry, she probably had a man for that too. Karlene was always busy weaving the characters of community together- Father Hugh and this wonderful church community, her colleagues at Stuart, her dear family, her beloved neighbors, Florence and Jim, her friends at Englishtown and we can’t leave out her little dog Tessa. Throughout the years we’ve all heard the stories of the wonderful webs of community she formed.

I loved when she would tell about her summer theatre adventures with Jack in the New Jersey neighborhood barn. Karlene was always renewing herself and her learning. She often talked of the lectures she attended or the latest news report and always added a newspaper clipping or two to the mix of information. Her active mind kept her youthful, fresh and fun.

“The Lord God Made Them All”  The last lesson Kalene taught my class was the Legend of the Dogwood. Here is the story:

Once upon a time,

“Many years ago, a dogwood tree grew on a hill outside Jerusalem. In those days, the dogwood tree was as tall and mighty as an oak, and this tree was the tallest of all the dogwoods, and extremely proud of its strength.

“Something wonderful is going to happen to me,” it said to anyone who would listen. “I’ll probably become the mast that holds the big sail on a grand ship, or the main timber supporting a great house.”

Unfortunately, the huge old dogwood was cut down to become the cross to which Jesus was nailed. The tree was horrified. All its dreams of glory were smashed, and it groaned in agony as two boards from its trunk were nailed together.

Jesus took pity on the tree, even as he carried it to Calvary. “You will never be put to such use again,” He told it. “From this day on, your shape will change, even as will the world. You will become slender and sway easily with the breeze. And instead of acorns, you will bear flowers in the shape of a cross… with two long and two short petals. In the center of the outer edge of each petal, there will be nail prints… brown with rust and red with blood stains to show the world how you have suffered.”

“Last of all, the center of your flowers will be marked as though with a crown of thorns to remind people forevermore, that you and I spent our last moments together.” And so it was. And so it is.” (looking for the citation of this story)

I didn’t realize until recently that Karlene’s daughter- Cindy’s memorial tree was a dogwood.

It suddenly became clear why she pushed herself to tell that story to the children on that last day. Now I understood why she told that story. She had experienced the deep groan of the dogwood in her own life. Yet she was here to tell, each year, the story of the crown of thorns and the forgiveness in those sweet white spring blossoms.

Karlene would not want us to cry or want all the fuss. We knew she probably wouldn’t even come to her retirement dinner, so in the last few days of school, the children started stitching her a quilt. When we found out she was in the hospital, we stitched a little harder.

“Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God.” Matthew Chapter 5: Verse 8. To her family, Jack, Kristen and Eddie, Brian, Grace, Maryn, Molly and Sophie, we offer these humble words, stories and memories of your wife, mother, grandmother and friend.

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Quilt for Karlene
Quilt for Mrs Paxton, sewn by Kindergarten-5th Grade students


5 thoughts on “A Life Well Lived: Eulogy for Karlene Paxton, First Grade Teacher

  1. Heidi, this is a beautifully told story and tribute! What a gift, to have had Karlene in your life. Thank you also for sharing your gift – telling a part of her story. Loving thoughts coming your way. hugs, Ellie

  2. Thank you, Heidi! You painted the picture of the Karlene we knew and loved. It brought tears and laughter, in just the right amounts. Your words were a gift for all of us!

  3. well, I am deeply sad to learn this, but I know that her wonderful friend Mary Ramsey is guiding her into the next beautiful phase…Mary loved her…

  4. Hearing it at church was so beautiful, such a sad joy.
    Seeing it in print gave me the time to really remember Karlene, to share in the treasures of her life–and therefore ours–at Stuart.
    I miss her so very much. I was truly blest to have known her.
    Thank you so much, Heidi. Your words were your heart.

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